Sunday, November 29, 2009

Vibram on a Hike

Most of my time has bee taken up thinking about, and trying out, my new shoes.

I needed a new pair of shoes. My old shoes were, well, old-the soles were okay but the velcro straps had lost their velcroiness. Also, they were several years old and I was rather bored of them. I am not sure what to call them: they are a pair of ubiquitous trainers, tennis shoes, sneakers. None of these names seem appropriate for a shoe that I basically wore with jeans on the weekend-not being someone who trains, plays tennis or is sneaky-at least not in a physical sense.

Ah, so that's why the soles were in such good condition.

At any rate a couple of months ago I decided to take up jogging and so the old shoes actually began to be used as they were meant to be. But then, I was told by well meaning people at the gym that no, my shoes were not meant for running, they lacked support especially since I have flat feet. Having a delicate knee and a love of new things I decided to invest in a pair of shoes. This way, I could keep one pair in my locker at the gym and one at home.

Since Nane gets a discount at New Balance, I investigated their shoes first. There are several designs for the flatfooted. How many people have flat feet anyway? Appearantly a lot, since there are so many possibilities out there.

Most people say that to protect your knees and feet you need a thick padded shoe with plenty of arch support. New Balance shoes will protect your feet and slip them into an ideal running position. I was entranced by the all the different possibilities and a good friend swear by them.

But I remembered a friend talking about Vivo shoes a couple of years ago. I looked at them: they were pricey (at the time I was broke) and not really the style I was after. But their philosophy, that you should feel the ground that you are walking on felt right and made me wonder about these cushiony New Balance shoes. Since my flat feet weren't one in a million--it didn't seem right to me that I needed all these fixes to be able to run. I mean there shouldn't be that many of us that will injure ourselves running right? Running should be a natural, easy thing for humans to do.

At the same time, over at the NY Times someone was training to run the NYC marathon. This meant that there were way too many posts about jogging, running and marathon training. And among all of these articles were a few that focused on barefoot running and Vibram Five Fingers shoes. These shoes were the antithesis of New Balance shoes, essentially gloves with an almost puncture proof flexible soul, they promised to let my feet be what they are supposed to be.

Now, the shoes look strange, people stare at them; and not always nicely. People will ask about them and opine freely. I myself went up to someone who was wearing them asked questions about them and then concluded the conversation by pointing out that they do look peculiar... So the shows are not fo rhte timid; however, They may be a good way to make friends.

Anyone who knows me, knows the way this ends. I mean, there was no way I was going to go for the trussed-up unnatural way to run when there was a "natural" way to do it. It's not in me. I don't know that the vibram shoes are better for me; I worry about my knee and hope I am not damaging it futher; but I can't fight against my ideology, New Blance never had a chance.

I have jogged in them (fun), worn them around the city (mixed), to a stony beach (not recommended) and even gone on a light hike with them (wonderful).

All I can say is get them.

I used to see toes socks and think "But I think my toes like to be together" They don't. They ant to be free and individuated you just don't know it yet. The shoes only flaw (besides their appearance which is growing on me) is that if you aren't walking your feet will get cold; toes, it turns out, help keep each other warm just like fingers do in mittens. As long as you are walking even slowly they'll be okay but pop into a restaurant and have a meal on a cold day and your feet will get cold.

Wednesday, November 25, 2009


Coffee art.

What are skills that are worth learning? Are there things that are too trivial--so that spending time on them becomes irresponsible to your development as a human being? I think I struggle with this question because I am so good at finding these peculiar outlets. I always come back to Adorno's The Culture Industry. Surely these passtimes are the faux-creative outlets that the middle class give itself like home remodeling etc.

Tuesday, November 24, 2009

How I have whiled my time away today...It started several weeks ago when I was sitting in what may be the most beautiful coffee shop talking with the owner about two new coffee houses that were opening up in the neighborhood. There had been a bit of a virtual feud between either the two coffee shops or fans of the two coffee houses culminating in each of their street creds being questioned. One is owned by someone whose family has owned stores and buildings in the neighborhood for who knows how long and the other by some young newcomers who clearly have the pulse of this gentrifying 'hood. Words have flown and articles have now been published about the two shops. All dancing around one interesting issue which remains unspoken but very much in the air. The newcomers to this previously predominantly Afro-Caribbean, Black-American and African neighborhood are black while the old time-but never resident- member of the community appears to be white.
It puts a different twist on gentrification right? It would be one thing if the old time community member had ever lived in the neighborhood, but he has made it clear that he has never been interested in that.
The final twist is that the old time member is not white --by US standards--although he does pass and seems to actively choose to do so.

Sent via BlackBerry from T-Mobile

Thursday, November 12, 2009


The other day I was reading a NYT article about crazy mothers who spend too much time making bentos for their children and how competitive this gets. But did I say "Oh god poor kids! Poor women,"? NO. Instead, I thought "I should make Bentos!"
So I have for the last two weeks. SO here is my latest not-dissertation activity. This is Hugo's because I didn't take a picture of mine and am too embarrassed to take a photo of it in the coffee shop.
In his bento: whole grain rice with black sesame; pesto stuffed mushrooms (basil from my garden) mini chicken pot pie (use muffin tins to make) lettuce (from garden) with sprouted mix greens and sun-dried tomatoes. Sugar snap peas (probably the last from our garden. Purple cauliflower and I forget what its called broccoli sauteed with mustard seeds and ume salt and grapes.

Tuesday, November 10, 2009


I watched Brick Lane last night and loved it. I was surprised in that I had expected to watch a few minutes of it and then move on but I was trapped by its beauty and really ended up being involved in the film to the point where internet searches were, for the most part, put on hold and I just leaned back and watched it. I had picked up the book in an airport,or train station, a couple of years ago and had read it fitfully on the plane (train?) so I had not expected to like it so much.
Of course a huge part of it is the sheer beauty of the film, the saris. the scenes of Indian village life, even the fussy interior of Nazneen’s apartment is lit in moody shadowy blue.
But there was so much more; somehow without being able to tap into the character’s mind at ease I was able to relate to them so much more. It’s a rare film that can make you identify with almost every character. It’s no surprise that we are able to feel the claustrophobia caused by Nazneen’s isolation and confusion and the way her life broadens through her awakening with Karim. Shahna’s teenage angst and disgust with her father is portrayed well. In some ways she is as closed off to the viewer as she is to her parents: what she thinks about, who her friends are, what her day is like when she is outside her Brick Lane apartment are a cipher; but with one look she shows us that she can see through her father’s bluster, and its clear that Shahna pities her mother with a mix of condescension and love that only teenager can pull off.
But perhaps the character who elicits the most surprising sympathy is Chanu. In the novel, its harder to sympathize with him even though its clear enough that he is struggling against forces far beyond his control. In the film, Satish Kaushik pulls off an amazing feat; he creates a character who is inherently lovable even as he shows time and time again that he doesn’t view Nazneen as anything other than his wife, someone that is there only to see to him. There is no sense that he feels he has the right to subjugate Nazneen to his will because he doesn’t seem to understand that Nazneen has a will to subjugate.
On the one hand, optimism his love of literature and his desire to improve himself using Hume, and prizing of Bangladeshi culture instead of say The Secret endears him to the reader; on the other hand it’s painful to watch him use this idea of culture as a talisman that will propel him into success and perhaps more to the point what differentiates him from most of the Bangladeshi community and and the working class whites in his neighborhood. Despite the fact that he doesn't seem to be able to use the texts to really make sense of his world; there is a cohesive nature in his understanding of the world My Golden Bengal though butchered by his daughters, informs the speech he gives at the meeting, as does much of what he quotes. While it hasn't made him any more comfortable or secure in his world his reading has given him a lens through which he can understand the world, if he only had the confidence to do so.
From the novel we know that Chanu is fat, unattractively so, but it’s Kaushik who makes this part of his character instead of one more reason for Nazneen to be not be attracted to him. Unlike, the successful fat man whose weight is a symbol of his all he is able to consume, or the jovial fat man who seems to be unconcerned with his weight; Kaushik plays a man who never seems to fit anywhere who acts like he knows he is taking up too space room in a world that has no room for him. His arms seem to flail awkwardly as if they can’t lie flush against his body.
Only when he is playing the tourist does he seem to expand naturally taking up his natural place. It is heartrending, then, to hear him tell the couple who takes their photo that they are from Bangladesh. It clear he wants to imply that they are on holiday soaking up the English sites. It of course begs the viewer to ask why have they never gone to the museums or sites in England if Chanu prizes, or fetishizes, culture so much. It can only be because inside he feels they aren’t supposed to be there; for, the film makes clear that he is not a hypocrite who simply owns the texts of culture but doesn’t read them. He genuinely tries to interact with the great thinkers and artists that he has been taught to admire; but his insecurity is such that he falters and changes the subject when he realizes anyone else is familiar with the texts.
All of this contextualizes his willful blindness of Nazneen's personhood. If he clearly doesn't care about her as an individual. It's because any individual who is that close to him is a threat--someone who might see through him. His subjugation of Nazneen comes not so much from the heavily patriarchal culture bolstering his decisions--although certainly that is what gives his actions a cultural legitimacy that Nazneen doesn't know how to struggle against--as from a terror of being judged and found wanting. He is always using texts to protect himself from the world; as Shahna snottily points out he is never quiet; whether reading from a guidebook, wondering what taste is, or chattering on about whether he should take Proust or Thackery back home he needs to fill every moment just the way his body over fills the apartment. He is so busy defeding himself and protecting himself from the accusation of "you don't belong and you are not good enough" that he erases Nazneen's existance. Even in the end, when Nazneen keeps trying to tell him she won't go back to Bangladesh, he can't hear her, it's too threatening because it means he is not returning for her and that he must return alone.
The character that is drawn least sympathetically in the film is that of Karim. He is charismatic and exciting and handsome and most importantly he sees Nazneen as a person. To be sure he idealizes her, projects his fantasies of both a real Bangladeshi girl uncorrupted by the English culture he knows he has become part of, and clearly sees her as a stand in for a mother he lost too soon. His frequent comparisons of Nazneen with his mother are both tender and deeply disturbing. In the end, he doesn’t understand or know Nazneen, but he still sees her-- knows she is her own entity, someone who has opinions even if he is not terribly concerned with what those opinions might be; something we get the feeling Chanu only realizes at the end. Of course, when Chanu realizes it, he is able to truly see Nazneen something Karim cannot do.
It’s easy enough to understand what changes Karim from a young man who is disenchanted with the English society he knows he’s part of, to one that finds god and joins a Pan-Muslim society. But seeing some of what causes this would help draw us to him. From the beginning we know that he is willing to struggle for a more equitable world, and a world that includes and accepts him. We see his daring spirit when he steals the box of racist flyers that the white supremacists are planning on posting. the things that is one of the only times we see what this Bangladeshi community encounters when they interact with the outside world. While the viewer hears Chanu ranting about the backlash against Muslims this, other than knowledge drawn from outside of the text, is the only real hint we get of just how life changed for Muslims after September 11th. A couple of short scenes, or even one scene that showed the new pressures brought upon Muslim communities in England a post-September 11th world would have gone a long way to creating an emotional instead of purely intellectual understanding of what shifts Karim from Bangladeshi with nationalist predispositions to a man slowly committing to what seems to be a Salafi-like understanding of Islam and one who is interested in the concept of a pan-Muslim community. This silence is less pronounced in the novel; but in the film Karim is the character closest to being a caricature of the angry-Islamized young man. he novel mentions incidents, stabbing of a Bangladeshi youth for example, and we see Karim go from attacking the Bengali gangs roaming the neighborhood to insisting that either they do not exist or that they are mischevious at worst. In the film Karim’s change is largely effected physically, we know he has changed because he is now signifying his religious alliegance not just by wearing the religiously prescribed beard and head covering, but by donning a Salwar Kameez, and choosing a rather universal looking Kameez, (light-colored, long and unadorned it could be worn by a man Cairo just as easily as one in Dhaka) instead of one that reads Bangladeshi.
All in all, this was a very satisfying film. One of its most beautiful aspects is how well it shows that its not until Nazneen can act like an individuated, actualized human being that she can truly love her husband. Her growing independence does not separate her from her husband as much as her husband’s fear of being a failure separates him from his family. Nazneen has come full circle; she has found that she does have something she can give her husband--whether that love and respect would remain intact is irrelevant; her self actualization has made her realize that she is a person who matters and so for the first time it matters whether she cares for Chanu or not. As such we see how patriarchal society has not just hurt Nazneen, her daughters, Razia, and (in the novel her sister) it has hurt Chanu and Karim. Who would Karim be if he could see the real Nazneen? It's impossible to know. But who might have Chanu become if he could have seen the real Nazneen and had one relationship in which he could have been himself instead of pretending to be the "great man" at home...